May 21, 2010

Taking a closer look at love......

...or subject should more accurately be "How to keep believing in love".
For my frequent readers, you'll know I had a give-away a few weeks back where one of the tasks to win was to suggest upcoming blog-topics.

Just to be clear.... I'm no expert!! Simply a blogger with a task....or a mission if you will.......

EMMA E - this one is for you ;))

How to keep believing in love
Well......honestly, when you are happily in love, this is the easiest thing in the world and just the opposite when you are not.
So, how can you keep believing in love when all you do is get hurt, get turned down, feel alone, get flirted with by people you couldn't even consider having a 2 minute conversation with or worse (?) not flirted with at all??
Gosh..... If I had the answer to this, I'd be rich in selling books and probably even have my own TV-show by now!! No one can really answer this question as it would depend on everyone being shaped in the same mold....which is far from our reality!
BUT, I do have some thoughts on things to keep in mind while trying to believe in love ;)

There is absolutely NO reason for you to settle for something less than awesome!! If you are afraid of being alone, ask yourself why and work on that first..... I mean, if you don't like your own company, why do you expect someone else to? A mindset like that wears off on people...


Remember that YOU are certainly unique and awesome!

Everyone has flaws. No one is perfect!! That's as true for you as for everyone else.........

Trust your intuition.

Compromising is sometimes necessary, but beware of compromising too much on things that really matter to you!! After all, you want someone who loves you, no?

All good relationships require hard work...... Flawless is for things - NOT for people.

Believing that you alone can make someone else happy or believing that someone else alone can make you happy is neither realistic nor fare (I'm trying to learn this one myself ;)) ...finding someone who loves to see you happy is probably more the key here than finding someone who can make you happy.

Stop obsessing about it!! People can sense these things more than you can imagine....whether THEY know it or not. ......so stop obsessing, but don't stop trying. I realise being alone and being low is not easy....but do you honestly think being happy all the time is?? Hard work pays off in the end.....

Tell yourself that when it comes to love, being naive is way better than being cynical!!
Imagine meeting someone for a date and all you hear is "I don't believe in that shit...." or "Everyone knows love is for fools....." or "Of course there is no such thing as love at first sight!!".
Not fun to hear.....not fun to believe.....simply not fun.

Meeting someone while your out dancing/partying is tricky....but I do have a small theory!!
I call it "The smiling theory" (yes, it has been slightly tested, but it should be mentioned, there was alcohol involved.....both for the testers and the preacher of this theory ;)).
Best shown in pictures:

POSERS (I'm talking Zoolander, Blue steel ;)) will be sure or at least have huge potential to find someone willing to take them home for the night.

SMILERS are much more likely to find someone who falls in love with their smile and will want to make sure that smile stays on.
KEEP SMILING!!!! If not successful, at least you'll train your facial muscles ;)) (Happiness is the best facelift!).

Shouldn't the question rather be "Why would you NOT believe in love??" After all......Everybody wants to love and be loved in some way.

......and those who say they don't, believe they have a good reason for it. My opinion is that they are most likely wrong - but you or I can't change their minds. They have to want to change and some people are unfortunately comfortable being miserable..... Sad but nevertheless true. Love is scary!!!! Especially the thought of unreturned love.

Mindset is key! Keep believing. You have to!! “A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes” Mahatma Gandhi

....last but not least!! Miracles happen over and over, the sun rises every morning, people have invented AMAZING things, roughly 359 000 children are born every day. Why would you not be able to believe in such a natural part of life as LOVE?

I think this Deepak Chopra quote is veeeeeery good too: "The known is the prison of past conditioning. We must step into the unknown to be free"
...isn't it also so that many times, we are still dwelling on things that happened in the past which disables us from moving on?? Are you attracted to the impossible because you don't want to be vulnerable in the possible?? Maybe you don't want to let someone in because you're scared of being hurt? Be bold!! Take risks! Dive into the cold water!! After all, if you never try, you'll never know........ Try and fail - but don't fail to try!!
What doesn't kill you DOES make you who you are and you are stronger because of it. Regretting things you never did is much worse because you didn't even get the experience out of those, just the headache ;))

Be yourself in your quest for love!!! Everyone else is already taken!

Conclusion....
There is no such thing as a special universal recipe for love or for how to make someone love you OR to fall in love with someone for that matter.... What you can do is simply relax and go with the flow!! BUT, make sure you are fit for purpose. What I mean is make sure you are happy with who you are and if you're not - find out why and deal with it.
Enjoy your own company....same principle, if you don't, ask yourself why. I for sure believe that change is possible if you WANT to change.


I think this is the 3rd or 4th time I write this - but I will write it over and over again:
THE WORLD IS YOUR OYSTER!!! You can do whatever you want to do (within legal limits ;))) and be whatever you want to be!!! Believe this and good things will come your way........eventually.......

xox
Linda - Believer in and lover of LOVE ♥♥♥ .....lost in Switzerland...

4 comments:

  1. That is beautiful! Thank you ♥
    Love
    Lydia

    ReplyDelete
  2. So true! People seem to have problems understanding they're not meant to be perfect.
    I just recently found your blog and will keep coming back. Keep inspiring!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Tack sjalv!! Kan ju tyvarr inte svara pa din fraga dock =)))) Men det viktigaste ar nog att tro pa sig sjalv ;)
    KRAM

    ReplyDelete

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